When The President Stands… No One Sits.

Let’s recap this week:

• We learned an all male panel is the best judge for women’s reproductive rights.
• We learned “an asprin between the knees” still seems like a birth control option… for 95 year old billionaires.
• And last but not least, it looks like Mitt Romney might lose the primary in his home state.

With all this crazy, I was excited to tune into Real Time with Bill Maher this week. While sometimes I find myself cringing as he skips right over the line between right and funny and parachutes into offensive, I always enjoy his show and feel like I learn something. Now that Entourage is off the air, he is the WHOLE reason I still have HBO. (Sorkin’s Newsroom will be reason #2 in a few short months.)

And may I just say, that once I got past a gay joke about Anderson Cooper, Maher did not disappoint.

In particular, the last of his “New Rules” this week really won me over and I was dying to share. All I wanted to do was to find the clip. Surely someone else was amused and posted it online. So I searched and searched to no avail.

Damn.

Then I thought, well, I’m watching it on my DVR. Surely someone else did too, SOMEONE thought this rule was BRILLIANT, and wrote it down. Blogs? Message Boards? Anything?

No such luck.

DAMN.

Normally, out of sheer laziness I would have moved on at this point but the New Rule was just too good.

So I watched and rewatched the clip, to provide you with the below text.

If Mitt Romney really wants to win over conservative viewers, he needs to one up Jan Brewer and spit on Obama’s shoes. From Bill O’Reilly interrupting the president 48 times in a 15 minute interview to Joe Wilson heckling him in a speech before Congress to Arizona Governor Jan Brewer sticking a finger in his face, something unprecedented is happening in the way conservatives disrespect this president. And I’m not talking about mere words uttered hundreds of thousands or miles away. Sean Hannity can say whatever he wants, no one looks to him as a model human being, or even a human being. And I, of course, am very guilty or actually proud, of innumerable insults to former President Bush, calling him a “A rube” “A cypher” “A shit kicker” “a yokel on the world’s stage” “a catastrophe that walks like a man” “the cowboy from Toy Story” “Drinky McDumbass” “President Larry The Cable Guy” And then in Season 2…

But I didn’t call him that to his face, nor would I if I had the chance. And that is the difference.

Now the deal we’ve always had with the president’s is that we smile and talk nice to them when they are in front of us and we cut them down and say horrible nasty things about them behind their backs. This has always worked for 8th grade girls and it has always worked for the United States of America. But there is something about this president that makes conservatives think it is ok to go ape shit in his presence. They didn’t do this to Carter, an actual pacifist or Clinton, who really did have a plan for universal health care or LBJ, who actually made it easier for poor people to vote and eat- All of them clearly evil, America haters. But they got treated with a modicum of respect at least to their faces. Not Obama. What can it be that’s different about him?

It’s either his race or it’s your brain chemistry or it’s something about how your dad spanked you and you liked it and you were looking at a box of Cream of Wheat.

I don’t know- I’m not a therapist.

Maybe it’s not race, I don’t know what’s in people’s hearts. Except Newt Gingrich, I know what’s in his heart. Lust and Cheese Fries.

But, this type of in the room, in your face, in your space, disrespect is new. Admit that- and I will admit that, of course, something like impeaching Clinton was far more serious, but it was also at least, in some ways, more respectful. It was done with high pomp, through official channels. It was all about rule of law, and the Chief Justice wore a special robe that he got from a musical or something. And somehow, that is a lot more respectful than this. (See below.)

Not that is Obama ever did anything like what Clinton did, he’d even be alive. Can you imagine what they’d do if they found out Obama had sex with a White House intern on Easter? Talk about colored eggs.

He would have been impeached two times- one for each testical.

This president has had to be the Caesar’s wife of Pennsylvania Avenue, the Jackie Robinson of American politics, never reacting to the taunts from the stands. But after you do this, to try and get his goat- what’s next? A wedgie? A purple nurple?

Governor Brewer said she did this because she felt threatened. Riiiggghhht. Like Obama ran a finger down her blouse and said “You my white princess.”

-Real Time with Bill Maher

I had a friend, who even when I was frustrated with President Bush would talk to me about the wonder of the office and the respect the position deserves. Watching this Real Time clip, I couldn’t shake that same feeling.

We deserve better than minimizing the presidency to finger shakes and heckling. It’s not about agreement, it’s about respect.

Think West Wing.

How much is too much? (My friend is much better than me.)

My friend Matt is smarter than me. 

He sings better than me, he writes better than me and he is continually funnier than me.

He also has a blog that is much better than mine because 1) He remembers to write on it on a consistent basis and 2) Did you not read the part about being funnier, smarter and a better writer than me?

The only time I beat him is on the rare occasion when he posts weird singing videos. I’m sorry Matt but I kick your ass on those “vlog” days. Brief classical training does make strumming a ukelele and creating your own songs ok.

Anyway, the other thing Matt has going for him is that he legitimately loves to write. He has a gift. I’ve kept just about every note he’s ever written me (including one where he outlines how I’m actually a gay man trapped in a woman’s body) because I’m convinced one day he’ll be famous.

While my blog posts usually take a sharp turn to the heartfelt and sarcastic, Matt always manages to make me laugh so hard I cry. He grasps brevity, where I blather on for 700 words.

Perhaps most of all, while I’m a card carrying crazy liberal some (most) days, his pieces are so funny, it’s almost impossible to find fault.

Almost.

Yesterday, after a particularly funny post that may or may not have suggested that, “Mitt Romney burns a $100 bill every time he sees a homeless person peddling for change” his mom decided to have a “carefrontation.”

She’s concerned that with his business degree and corporate dealings, someone might find him offensive.

While his response involved the assertion that if Fox News got away with so much hyperbole, then so could he, it really got me thinking: How much is too much?

Once upon a time, Miss Manners used to demand that people not discuss money or politics. It makes for bad conversation and for ill-feelings. But with the internet, a giant blank wall, awaiting all of our respective work vomit- where do we draw the line?

To the concern of future jobs- I can’t imagine working somewhere that cared who I voted for or how giddy I was when Rick Perry couldn’t seem to count to three. It’s part of who I am- I don’t want to ignore that.

Plus, I’m in a field where there are tons of creative people. I could make some generalizations here but instead, let’s just say that while I’ve never done an industry wide poll, I’m going to guess there are more than two people who would identify as being LGBT (or LGBT friendly) working in ad agencies, public relations firms and other communication fields- all across the country. (Possibly many more than 2.) So I think everyone can be ok with me expressing my beliefs in equal rights, or at least not SEEM too intolerant.

Other than that, I’m not sure.

How much is too much?

“The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge of controversy.” -Martin Luther King Jr.

Don’t start- I know my blog isn’t changing the world or breaking down racial barriers a la MLK. But I firmly believe that the passions we have, the beliefs we hold and the stupidity we are brave enough to speak out against may one day help make a difference.

You know, to the two of you still reading this.

Let’s talk about reproduction!

Because I am me, I successfully picked the most conservative, Christian, pro-life, anti-abortion movie of the Heartland Film Festival bunch. Damn it. I’ll admit it is humorously ironic, although I’m still a little bitter at my mom for the sheer glee she got out of knowing I ended up in the middle of THIS.

My choice for movie #6 of my 9 film Heartland Film journey, October Baby, was chosen solely because I am an October baby. I figured it couldn’t be worse of a decision making move than say, a choice based on fictional characters, also known as the Zoe/Peggy debacle.

And while I left feeling like October Baby was an infinitely better made movie than A Buddy Story, I couldn’t help but feel once again women were getting cheated with a drastically one sided view of a woman’s choices.

Let me back up. The movie is the story of a girl, Hannah, who finds out she was adopted, after her birth mother tried to abort her and her brother. The early third trimester abortion failed and the mother went into labor instead, delivering twins. The son was  badly hurt as a result of the abortion and died soon after. The baby girl, Hannah, makes it and is now a 19 year old freshman in college.

So Hannah decided to go on a journey to find answers and find her dirty slut career oriented mother and to hear the tale from a nurse of the failed abortion attempt. In unnecessary character information, we also find out she’s a virgin and refuses to even sleep in the same room as a man. Lovely. Oh. And that she’s baptist.

(Of note- We also find out that the twins and I share a birthday- October 7th. Bizarre coincidence, right?)

Here’s the thing. For the first chunk of the movie I thought it was a well made, compelling tale. While I found Hannah to be a tad pious and the fact that she decides to announce she’s a virgin a little ridiculous, I was tracking. ( But seriously- Can you imagine an innocent conversation with your best friend where they randomly throw in “I’m a virgin”? If you’re bestie’s wouldn’t you know that? I digress.)

Even as we listened to the story of the failed abortion attempt, I thought ok- yes. This is WHY women’s education is important- why a woman’s right, not just to choose but to education and superior health care is NECESSARY. Late term abortion’s are fraught with issues and from what the nurse said, this clinic, from 1990, wasn’t staffing knowledgeable doctors. Women need options, women need a high standard of care as well as the counseling and education to understand decisions. Ok. I’m with you movie director.

And then as we meet the birth mother- I’m expecting answers, an explanation, something. As it turns out, she’s just portrayed as formerly slutty, still bitchy career type, who doesn’t have time for Hannah or her questions.

And I couldn’t help but be frustrated. The movie should have been a call to action. Not just dealing with forgiveness and the past but also, how to prevent things like this from happening in the future. The answer isn’t lifelong chastity for the “good girls” (Hannah’s romantic interest it seems has had sex, presumably with his bitch girlfriend. A real underlying motif here was that bitches are in turn dirty whores. Or maybe that’s just what I got out of it.) but to understand- to make INFORMED choices. In the story, pregnancy resulted from a one night stand, and the birth mother was absolutely blamed, for both the choice and the resulting abortion. What about the dad? Why are we STILL, in 2011, blaming the woman for being a slut, for wanting to terminate the pregnancy to advance her education, and most of all for presumably not having the education or support system to make a better decision than a late term abortion??

In front of me in the theater was a mom with 4 or 5 teenagers in tow. All I could think was that this sort of message was dangerous for 14, 15, year old girls to be getting, especially if it was the only one they were getting. Teenagers have sex. Like it or not, it’s a reality and ignoring the situation, a lack of education for teenage girls is what GOT the birth mother in the position she was in!

In an attempt to counter the stupid- I am posting the below video, in which Rachel Maddow explains birth control, and you know, anatomy, to Mitt Romney. It’s great- watch it. Now.

p.s. Movie #5, entitled Crime after Crime, was a powerful, and surprisingly loving and humorous documentary, telling the story of the fight for justice for a woman who continually got screwed (I can’t think of a more tactful word. Sorry.) by the California justice system. Do some research, if you can. I was incredibly surprised but just how many women in the justice system had been victims of abuse (80%) and just how stacked the system is against these women, without the resources to fight. I have always had a heart for women’s rights (you couldn’t tell right?) and this movie broadened my scope of how difficult that fight sometimes is, for women, and minorities. Crime after Crime? Surprisingly uplifting and so full of heart.