It’s January 2, which means I am obligated to do a looking back, looking ahead, new year’s resolution post.
And, because it’s me, it’s also obligated to be a day and a half late and slightly dysfunctional because I just can’t manage to do things like normal people.
My goal for 2012 was to say yes more. Super easy right? I remember confessing it, via Twitter, to a then acquaintance who’s New Years Resolution was far loftier than mine and feeling slightly sheepish or like it was some how a come on.
“Hey there sweetcheeks- Tell me what you want, I promise to say yes…”
Oddly, or somewhat serendipitously, the then acquaintance has become one of the people who means the most to me from 2012- an absolute reflection of my “Saying Yes” mentality.
And in practice, I did a lot of things in 2012 I don’t usually do- I stepped outside of my box, over and over, in big ways and small. I spoke my mind, when I would usually be quiet, in moments of conviction, in moments of opportunity and, perhaps my biggest weakness, in moments of emotion. I worked on me- worked on being the person I aspire to be, and not settling as often. I took chances and put myself out there with the constant reminder to myself that I would regret “What if’s,” the question marks and ellipses in life’s sentences, far more than I would a period. I made a concerted effort to make excuses less and just do- even when I didn’t really want to. As a result I had more moments than I can count where I thought- God I wouldn’t change this life, this moment, this choice, for anything.
And not to get too rosy- 2012 included kissing a few frogs (metaphorically, thank god) and have a few tearful, stressful, frustrating nights. days. weeks. where I swore no more- that I had made the wrong choice, that I had put myself out there too much, that I had backed myself into a corner I was just tired of being in.
But overall, 2012 sure felt like a success.
So to address this year, I first had to ask myself what can I do better?
I was sad by the number of things from 2012 I was missing, when I looked back on the year. It’s easy to remember the biggest things- The annual pilgrimage to Chicago for Taste or my LA trip, Birthday Present to myself. But it’s the smaller, slightly less earth shifting things that seemed to get lost- I went cliff-diving and had Drake sing to me (Don’t start. I bought the concert ticket- HE COULD HAVE BEEN SINGING TO ME.), and worked my first poll (once again, don’t start). I
snuck in listened to Michael J. Fox speak and tried new foods and surprised my mom by taping her father’s story as part of Story Corps’ stop in Indianapolis for Christ’s sake and yet I had forgotten about ALL of these big 2012 things until I was tiding up my cyber life last night.
So how can I better celebrate the little things? Capture the milestones and moments? How can I better enjoy 2013?
And this line of thought led to the inevitable- How can I expand on the progress? If 2012 was an adjustment- to taking the baby steps I don’t usually take, then 2013 should be about getting the hell out of the building.
(What About Bob? No? Ok. Just watch.)
For example- In 2012, I bought furniture I previously would have just pinned on Pinterest and thought “I don’t need/ I can’t find/ I shouldn’t be spending my money.” I even took it a step further by dipping my toe into the DIY pool I’ve always admired from afar- I repainted furniture I previously would have either turned my nose up at or suffered through, which lead to my most DIY-ing friend commenting how great my furniture looked this weekend. I was THRILLED.
Yet, when I reflect, I’m surprised by the big leaps, I consistently don’t even consider. What about the larger undertakings? The impulsive stuff? The number of times I say “someday”?
The perfect example comes in the form of The Mouse (Doesn’t everything?).
I have talked about going to Disney for months now. Maybe even years. I talk about it so much that, when assigned a new property in the Florida area at work, my bosses’ first comment was, “It’s Florida. It is not however a trip to Disney. Just so you know.” And at some point, in the last few weeks, I wondered… Why aren’t I just making this happen? I’m not rolling in expendable cash but with some planning, and some saving, I can very easily spend a couple days getting my Disney fix. I don’t need permission, I don’t need to wait for someone to make this happen. I just need to do. (Let’s not spend too much time dissecting why this was a huge revelation, shall we?)
And, being a sucker for themes and quotes and inspirations, I’ve spent the last couple days thinking of 2013 taglines. But inevitably, anything I came up with sounds like it fell right out of a Shit-Girls-Say-Self-Help-Novel. (Is this a thing? Because it absolutely should be.)
Why Not Now? Take Big Steps. Make It Memorable.
I got diabetes just typing those. None-the-less, that is where we are.
Happy 2013 ya’ll. Let’s see what’s in store.
In just 24 hours the American people, who could tear themselves away from The Bachelor (I know it was hard, there’s constant intellectual wonderings- Do these women have some sort of attachment disorder that causes them to “love” so quickly? Why are men always attracted to the crazy one? Why is Ben’s hair so sad?) will have been able to witness not one but TWO major political events.
Ok. One semi-major event (The State of the Union) and one mind-numbingly repetitive one (Another GOP Debate).
Either way- as I was watching the GOP debate last night, and as I contemplate the inevitable that will occur during tonight’s The State of The Union, I began to think:
What if we gave some pageantry pizazz to these lackluster and sometimes painful political events?
What if, at the end of the evening tonight, we got to see shots of congressmen riding Splash Mountain, Senators spinning on the Tea Cups, and President Obama and John Boehner running, hand in hand with Mickey Mouse, castle in the background, showing the pure joy that only Walt Disney’s magic can bring? Wouldn’t we all have a little more hope for America?
If only, just once, the people at the State of the Union could show up in full ball gowns, the men in bedazzled suits. We would rate them, not just for the intelligent people they are, but their poise, physical fitness and use of bling to highlight their “ass”-ets. State of the Union- win.
Take a cue from last year’s Outstanding Actress crew- everyone loves a good crowning. And some humor. And some not-being-awful. Let’s work on this shall we?
If you’ll remember, waaaay back in July, I did a list of 5 things I was loving: A southside Indianapolis bakery, an inexpensive line of cosmetics, a British clothing line, a moody cover and a time-killing app for the iPhone lovers.
Now, with slightly more than the 4 readers I had back then, and an ever expanding exploration I thought I would give this another shot. **
1) Which Disney Character will you be today? Disney Bound.
Leslie Kay, a fashion blogger, decided to combine her love of all things Disney with fun fashion and Disney Bound is the addictive product. Using Polyvore, she creates outfits based on Disney characters that capture their aesthetic and sense of fun.
I could go on for DAYS with my incredible love for what she does but instead I will move on- and let you check it out for yourself.
(p.s. If you fall in love with the site as much as I have, feel free to vote for her blog at http://bbmchallenge.blackberry.com/desktop/en/us/council/whitney-port/challenges.html)
1.5) And while you’re at it… Phillip Light
Check out the GORGEOUS artwork on the Disney Bound site.
3) Up All Night
I think part of the reason I have such a soft spot for this show is because the relationship between Ava and Reagan is much like my best friend Matt and I. It is also the marriage I aspire to have.
Anyway- I watch it Wednesday at 8:00 on NBC. Check local listings. Or whatever.
Yes, reading is something I love, especially with my handy dandy iPad making it infinitely easier to always have something new. And here is what I think you should be reading:
5) It’s going to be a wonderful Christmas with Michael Buble’s sexy self singing to me.
I know this is an incredibly cliche white girl Christmas thing. But I can’t help it. Because when he sings to me… well on a cd. Or on a tv. Whatever… I always love him. So until Christmas I will be listening to Christmas- The Special Edition incessantly. And dreaming of his future appearance at my front door, where he croons at me, with the Puppini Sisters bouncing away behind him.
Have a lovely Holiday. :)
** I really need another name for this series though. Obsessions- (Part 2) reminds me of Confessions (Part 2). You know, Usher? Baby mama drama? Excessive shirtlessness?
I’m not a big fan of girls.
This might strike one as odd, considering that I am a female, am friends with females, and generally spend the majority of my time around females. But recent dealing with my-fair-sex has left me… frustrated.
Which is why this Monday we’re going to have:
1) Take Back the Power in all Future Relationships.
Here’s the deal. From now on, you only pay attention to the men in your life who are working for your attention. Wait. Let me be more specific- You only pay attention to the men who are SPECIFICALLY working HARD for your attention. Not who happen to ask you out, not who text for a few days before going AWOL. The ones who are making real effort.
The guys worth your time, energy and, I’m sure, very specific dreams of the future will be sending you good morning texts. They will be asking to spend time with you, trying to woo you and to continually remind you of their worthiness. They will be surprising you with ridiculous presents and making you feel special, well past the initial “get-in-your-pants” phase. And trust me, the amount of effort, sets the tone for your entire relationship.
But Taylor, what if they are not sending strong signals they want to work to be with me?
Then imagine they have instead rented out a billboard that says they are not interested in you and therefore, not worth another second of your time.
2) Re-cultivate that Air of Mystery.
When you go on and on about your potential date/not date/boyfriend/not boyfriend, not only does everyone around you zone out, they all begin to secretly despise you.
Keeping in mind that less is more makes you instantly more likeable.
3) Make Rules. (And perhaps learn something from The Rules.)
Remember the controversial 1995 book about how to make a guy fall in love with you entitled “The Rules”?
Me either. But I do remember watching a 7th Heaven episode about it. Mary (Jessica Biel) and Lucy (What in the hell was her name… Beverly Mitchell) have a flirting contest because Mary doubts the validity of “The Rules” that Lucy is excitedly living by.
Who saw that 90′s tv regression coming? No one.
Anyway, here’s what we can learn…
Some of the “rules” in the book are a feminist’s nightmare. Play hard to get? What does that even MEAN?? Am I supposed to be running from a man I’m interested in? At a full blown sprint? That’s just exhausting, and I’d have to imagine confusing for the man. Don’t schedule a Saturday date after Wednesday? Most Wednesdays, I can’t even think of what my weekend looks like yet. I’m busy. I have a life. I’ll make plans when I please. Don’t discuss The Rules? Seriously? What is this- Fight Club??
Then there are rules like: Expect a present on your birthday and don’t rush into sex?
I believe the rule we’re actually looking for here reads as follows:
Have some self respect.
That’s the real secret of the modern day woman, looking to fall in love or you know… Not hate themselves. I just saved you the $12.99 you could have spent, buying some ridiculous self help book. Don’t say The Short List never gave you anything.
The point is- What is important to you? What do you need from a relationship? What are your bottom line expectations for life?
Great. Now don’t settle for less.
4) Let’s think about our standards…
I was discussing with a male friend the idea of opening a door for a woman or paying for her meal and he says, “What about women’s liberation? Isn’t that saying I don’t have to?”
Why yes, men of the world. It is saying you don’t have to.
In the same way I don’t have to give it up to the first man “with means” who bats an eye at me, a la Grandma-era standards.
See, that’s the real beauty of women’s liberation. We DON’T need men. We’d like to want them. And we’d like to feel they want us accordingly. Period.
Therefore, men? Your job is to make us feel wanted.
See, women, isn’t not being pathetic fun?
It brings about men willing to “offer-their-coat-pull-a-chair-chivalry” moments.
Women-Feel free to expect these things. If they don’t feel like offering it, you’re an independent woman and you aren’t looking for just anything. Move along. Quickly.
And Men- Feel free to insert all those things into your dating life. Liberally. Especially if you have annnny hope of inserting anything else… at a later date.
That is all.
Have a wonderful Monday!