1) Walking a dog in high heels screams “I have a death wish.” This morning I took Scout out before I left for work and was at a full 45 degree angle the entire time. She gets so damn excited by squirrels and has no regard for my springy desire for wedges.
2) In related news- I realized last night that, in my head, my dog’s inner dialogue is teen-angst Sally Draper. It is not lost on me, that this is probably because I identify so closely with Sally’s snarkiness. Several times in last night’s Mad Men premiere, I was absolutely giddy about her mean-ness.
“She acts like she’s 25 just because she uses tampons…”
“First of all… I don’t know why you’re counting my meals…” (Said to her “I-Eat-My-Feelings,” formerly fat, mother.)
3) Melissa McCarthy throwing a toaster at her “basketball players” was the highlight of my Saturday night. And Sunday morning. And the other 6 times I’ve watched this video.
4) I’m so super pale that a walk on the canal and an outdoor beer left me a rosey red color that screams- Why is this girl not outdoors more? Is she related to Casper the Friendly Ghost? Why the hell did she choose an oddly cut v-neck that has created tan (burn) lines on her, inopportune for any other top she might want to wear?
5) Is there anything more ridiculously depressing than accidentally wearing a really cute outfit on a day of boring? And, I know, I know, we should dress for fabulous every day. Insert Coco Chanel or Audrey Hepburn quote here. WHATEVER. That’s not who I am. I’m the girl who, if she had her choice (and it were socially acceptable), would live in v-neck t-shirt and stretchy work out capris (While not working out at all. Instead, maybe eating something). So when I happen to put together an outfit that makes me feel particularly kick ass, and I have nothing but BLAH that day? I get irrationally bitter and feel like I’ve been somehow cheated.
6) Stop bitching at me for live tweeting tv shows. It’s not my fault you’re not watching it. As far as I’m concerned, the joy of viewing TV shows with a large social following, is as much about the social experience as the content. (In some cases, i.e. The Bachelor, with no redeeming content value of its own, the social component is the only reason I tune in.) So if you’re NOT watching the show? You should probably stop refreshing your Twitter feed.
(Of Note: This is advice I have to follow myself. If I get sucked into something else during Scandal, I purposefully avoid Twitter all evening. And if I don’t? I’m obligated to not yell at Tweet-ers for spoiling it. It’s social media. I’m aware of know how it works.)
7) My “I Have a Dog” post received a ton of hits last week. Thanks for that, random people who don’t usually read my blog, and probably aren’t reading this mess. I must say- this post started out, seeming like a super good way to share the random thoughts I had that were too long for Twitter and too short for individual blog posts. Now I may just be rambling…
In related news, I’m also writing a weekly column of sorts for twentysomething Indy, an online magazine with so many articles far more interesting than anything I would say. But, in the event you happen to read this, and are insane enough to think “GOD. I just can’t get enough of her. I NEED more,” feel free to click away. Highlight? I have my own logo. I’m pretty proud of that.
That’s all for now people. Have a lovely start to your week.